Wednesday, February 13, 2008

The Joy of Essex, Part Two: Hawaiian Beef Salad

Here's another winner from the Essex Meat Packers, who instigated The World At Your Table. You know, the booklet I introduced a couple of posts ago. It is - something. You know it's a weird recipe, don't you, when the words in the title clash like the colors in a psychedelic paisley shift dress.

This one speaks for itself, really. Although it would be best if it didn't try to speak, and just went away quietly.

Hawaiian Beef Salad


1 1-lb can Essex Cooked Beef Roast
1 cup pineapple tidbits (10 oz can)
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/2 cup cheese spread

Cut the Beef into one-inch pieces. Drain off the natural juice and save for gravy or scalloped potatoes at another meal.

Mix together the Beef, pineapple tidbits and chocolate chips. Mix the mayonnaise and cheese spread together and fold into meat mixture. Serve individually on lettuce cups.

Very different. Your guests will be most impressed.

Well, now. "Very different" doesn't even begin to describe what mixing canned beef, chocolate chips, pineapple and cheez product (oh, and mayo) is.

And "most impressed" must be a euphemism for "totally gobsmacked."

The image is from a 1950s ad for Dole pineapple - people were crazy about pineapple back in the day, weren't they? "It's the new Hawaiian Harvest - at your grocer's NOW!" Go already, what are you waiting for! "Get some and serve some today." And that's an order, ma'am. We don't care where you put it - yeah, put it in the meat salad, whatever. Now you can pretend you're on the beach at Oahu.

Mind the chocolate chips though, they're going to melt if you leave it out on those sun-bleached rocks. Maybe you could substitute the marshmallows lying there on the rock - how'd they get there? Or a glass fishing float! Use your imagination!

That'll really impress those guests of yours!

2 comments:

ThriftShopRomantic said...

AGHHH-- Beef, mayonnaise, chocolate chips and... I don't know, I think my brain froze in terror after the chocolate chips.

Good gad, that's "unique."

Yes, nothing says "luau" to me like chocolate and mayonnaise on beef. Can't you just hear Don Ho singing "Tiny Bubbles" in the background?

You need the music, apparently, to cover the sound of your guests retching. :)

Yikes!
-Jenn

Rochelle R. said...

I simply must get a copy of this book. I am truly facinated by the weirdness of the two recipes you posted. I have seen some weird recipes in my vintage advertizing booklets but this one seems be in class by itself.