Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Talking To False Teeth

We're gearing up for next week's Halloween Retro, and what better way to do that than with a surreal set of false teeth - the kind that not only talk back, but when they do, they speak of "raising biting power."

These are very bossy dentures. Who invited them over? Not me. I don't want anyone to crab at me like that. And I certainly don't want a prosthetic device doing it, either. Especially not dentures. They're strange dentures, after all. Who knows where they've been? On some sort of chomping rampage, from the sound of it.

Even the ad writers can't help mentioning that "false teeth get on your nerves." That's not even a subtext, that's right out in the open.

I'm surprised they had the guts to say it. That set of dentures will be coming after them, seeking revenge. And as for mentioning "plate odor" - well, the Fasteeth people had better lock their doors tonight.

And they'd better be careful when they open the medicine cabinet - who knows what's hiding in there, waiting to have a few biting words...

3 comments:

Daisy said...

Well, I think I already have enough biting power.

Lisa said...

Yikes! That is a frightening ad. Very appropriate for the Halloween season.

Bill said...

You know, there are so many images the marketing department could have chosen:
♥ a lovely lady with a nice smile
♥ grandpa at a picnic
♥ a tin or tube of FASTEETH
♥ corn on the cob
But, no. They chose the scariest, ugliest dentures ever manufactured.
I think this was deliberate ad-sabotage by an employee who had just been passed over for a promotion.