Sunday, October 19, 2008

Your 1913 Tax Dollars At Work

And why is the War Department analyzing dust, you may ask?

Because for one thing it is 1913, and they are not busy with World War I.

It doesn't seem, judging by this advertisement, that the War Department had enough to do in 1913, really.

I didn't know what dust contained (aside from, well, dust particles) so I went over to my pal Wikipedia. And it says that dust is made up of solid particles of soil, pollution, hairs, synthetic fibers, paper fibers, and minerals.

But this is not dramatic enough for the War Department! Dust is "filth in its most dangerous form" and it spreads diseases. It is quite disgusting! Pretty well evil, really.

Which is where the B-B Mop comes into play (as opposed to the BB gun, I guess - because shooting pellets at dust does not really work).

If this B-B Mop and all its B-B friends are Dustless, does this not imply that they don't really work? If they did, they would be - well - dusty. It is the very nature of the Dust Cloth, for example, to end up being full of dust. Hence the name Dust Cloth.

Also please note that the B-B Mop has "here and there a yellow thread" unlike all the other black mops on the market. So you really do have to examine it closely. Just like all the flunkies over at the War Department who really, truly need something a little more pressing to do.

5 comments:

Tori Lennox said...

If dust is so darn dangerous, why didn't the War Department use it as a weapon during WWI???

Amy said...

see, back thn I don't think they had vacuum cleaners did they? And didn't they also have like mostly wooden floors? I wonder what they would think about dust these days?

Bill said...

I wish they had said "filth in its vilest form."
They really are a bit alarmist about household dust. I'm surprised they didn't say "Forget about that mold in the tub, or the unflushed toilet. For God's sake, woman, chase that dust mote!"
Still, it was canny of them to be vague about those yellow threads, casually advising that they are "here and there." Hard to copy that formula.
A man of science told me that household dust is mostly dead skin cells that we have shed. Now that does sound vile and possibly dangerous.

Emm said...

I wonder if they had advertising standards back then? I bet the closest a BB employee ever came to the US war department was attending the same school as one of their future employees.

Starcasm said...

Oh no, I think I spotted a dust bunny under the couch! I'm immediately putting on a face mask and alerting the War Department. I'm sure they're not busy, and will be concerned about my severe dust contamination situation.