Sunday, November 9, 2008

A Box Of Tricks

Or, How To Lose Money To A Guy In Cincinnati In Ten Days

First, write the cartoon man a nice letter and somewhere along the line, send him some money. Because even though he insists that it is all FREE, you know, don't you, deep down - that it isn't. Alas, it never is.

In fact, when the word FREE is in capital letters, it means you will end up paying MORE, in the end.

Eventually, the man will send you that box tied up with a string. And he says there are a whole lot of FREE things in that box.

Goodness me, whatever could they be? Free samples! But not JUST free samples: "I'll send you this big package...You'll see gorgeous, newest style dresses - lovely lingerie - hosiery - men's shorts and socks - all at LOW PRICES."

What, all in that little box? That is a lot of stuff. A lot of cheap-sounding stuff.

"Send no money!" Well, not yet, anyway. But you will be sending money. Plenty of money. Just - not yet. Not until the box has got you under its spell.

The free samples are - very special. Hypnotically special. They will make you want to send this nice man ALL your money.

That is, after all, how HE earns lots of money showing free samples.

And when you have sent him lots of money, just do whatever the box says. It will tell you what to do...


Over The Top Aprons said...

What a fun blog; I love all of your vintage pictures. They are great!

Bill said...

Wouldn't you love to hear from someone who fell for this ad? I'd love to know what the box contained!

Lidian said...

Over The Top Aprons - Thanks! I really liked your blog too!

Bill - I love these little ads and I always wonder who really sent off for the stuff in them. I wonder if one could ever find out?

Kirsten said...

I'm sure I can make millions showing FREE fabric samples! Where do I sign up!!

Amy said...

hmmm free samples? yay! The only thing is companies like this usually bug you to bits when you send in for their "free stuff".

Courtney said...

I have an award for you over at my blog, check it out!

Lidian said...

Kirsten - I guess somewhere in Cincinnati! :)

Amy - Yes, it is good that the internet didn't exist back then, or telemarketing, can you imagine?

Courtney - Thank you! :)