Tuesday, December 9, 2008

A Faceful Of Frowns

Yesterday we saw the strange connection between war bonds and constipation. The fun continues today with a weird 1942 ad that makes using Kotex look like an act of patriotism. Bet you never knew it was.

Sister looks like me after a day of Christmas shopping. It's rough out there, no kidding. The crowds, the endlessly annoying holiday music (ask Jenn if you don't believe me!), the store amnesia born of mounting fatigue ("What was it I came in for again? No idea!")

But Sister is doing far better things than looking for overpriced bath gel and digital whatsits. She's making navy helmets (is she knitting them, perchance? or does she have a little welding torch out in the garage?). She's got bandages to make, and a Defense Stamp Luncheon too. Those Defense Stamps are a bit chewy, so she'll need her energy.

Oh, and she's also teaching the armed forces how to wear frilly aprons and hold mixing bowls. That's a lot of work right there.

She keeps telling herself "Snap out of it!" Because a "faceful of frowns" is just not on. Kotex, of course, to the rescue. I'll spare you the accolades Kotex heaps upon itself. It's divine, basically. And it'll make Sister feel like she just won the lottery and found the Koh i Noor diamond in the pocket of an old dress at the back of the closet.

I have a better idea, actually. Sister needs to take some time off. And maybe some Rennies, too. I'll bet anything those Defense Stamps are giving her indigestion.

Image from the Duke University Ad Access collection, and if you click on the link you can see the larger image and read the whole drama yourself.

13 comments:

Shieldmaiden96 said...

I wish I still had the booklet from Kotex that explained 'Your Miraculous Body'...my sister gave it to me and it was older and more hilarious than the one that came in my plain manila envelope when I had that special class in5th grade where the boys were sent out to play kickball....I just remember that 'Smile, Sister, Smile' tagline.

Tori Lennox said...

This ad just leaves me dumbfounded.

Kirsten said...

lol! I love what you come up with every day!

Lidian said...

Shieldmaiden96 - I wish you did too! It sounds like a lot of laughs. We had those special classes too, but they didn't send the boys out and there was much embarrassment to be had all around (we were in 7th or 8th grade, this was in the mid 70s so they waited until we were supposedly more mature, ha ha)

Lidian said...

Tori - It is rather amazing in the full size image, too. This was as big as I could scan it, though. Maybe just as well...

Kirsten - Thank you! I have a meme to do and then I had better get on with some more Christmas ads, hadn't I?

Catherinette Singleton said...

I'd love to see a Presidential Debate sponsored by feminine hygiene products. God, that we be awesome. Could you imagine??

"This important debate brought to you by the makers of Tampax!"

~~louise~~ said...

Boy, it's a good thing I enlarged that ad, I thought you were making up one of your ingenious stories again. You were telling the truth! I almost feel like saying, "we've come a long way baby" except someone already has!

Bee said...

Hmmm Kotex do not help my face full of frowns during that time of the month. But the apron does.

Lidian said...

Catherinette - That would be fabulous, I say we suggest it for 2012! (Or maybe I had better let you do it, since I live in Canada!)

Or the Olympics, that'd be good too - imagine the possibilities!

Louise - I couldn't make this up if I tried! Or apparently make the scan any bigger, either. I did try to do that! :)

Bee - You know what helps when I have a faceful of frowns? An Advil, usually.

papercages said...

This reminds me of one of the ads that runs on TV now. I don't remember who does it (might be Kotex), but the tagline is, "Have a happy period."

You know that was written by a man.

Lidian said...

Papercages - I really hate that commercial, too!

Celia Pleete said...

HAHAHAHA - I'm consistently amused by retro menstruation adverts.

Lidian said...

Celia - Me too, in fact I may need a separate category for them, there are SO many aren't there, and all so wonderfully bizarre.