Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Command Performance

You certainly will be popular if you do what Dr. Sylvanus Duvall tells you to do. Not just tells: commands! He commands you to buy his book and follow his secrets of getting along with people!

Basically you want to get people to see things your way, cast a "psychological net" over them, and dominate everyone in the room. Then you make them do what you want!

Looks like just holding the book, which is radiating confidence (or something) is going to be enough to get people to see things your way and pretty well be the czar of every social gathering. Maybe you are supposed to hit people over the head with it if they don't agree with you. That'll convince them.

Plus you can get your boss to see things your way too - you can imagine how useful that is going to be.

"Watch your opponent wilt!"

"Never again will anyone be able to kid or mislead you!"

Look into the "deep recesses" of people's minds.

Won't you just be the life of the party! What fun it will be to hang out with you. The invitations will pour in, no doubt about it. Advertisement from Esquire, 1966.

15 comments:

Laura said...

Hmmmm...sounds like brainwashing to me.

Bill said...

Getting along with people = domination & command?

Nice.

Dr. Duvall must have been more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

Dan Brantley said...

That's it!
That weird Ernie, the dweeb from science class in High School, said he would get even with all of us. That we would be sorry one day.
My mind has been stripped of its money making abilities. All I can do is make jokes. I was not born a smartass, it was Ernie all along!
Curse you Ernie!!!
(Maybe I can get on that "Intervention" show on TV.)

Lidian said...

Laura - It does sound scary.

Bill - Oh yeah, he really does sound fun.

Dan - Yes, I can see a reality show coming out of this book, somehow.

Melanie said...

But, what happens when your "opponent" has read the book too? Then who's going to dominate. What if everyone in the office has read the book? A whole group of folks reading it could lead to -- world domination?

Tori Lennox said...

I wondered the same thing as Melanie. What if the person you want to control is trying to control YOU?

Does Doc Sly tell us how to combat THAT???

Amy said...

oooh wonder if this would work with my kids? (not)

Lidian said...

Melanie - That's an excellent point! Dr D assumes that there will only be one person who has read this book in any one crowd - but, as you say, if it's so popular....what if they all read it? I know one thing, I don't want to be in that room!

Tori - Of course he doesn't tell us how to handle this! (Maybe that will be the next book, which would cost more money)

Amy - It probably wouldn't work with anyone, it doesn't sound all that subtle.

Natural said...

i'll take two. lol. funny though he commanded people buy the book.

well advertisers today use a similar tactic, but they are sneaky about it. just listen to words they choose. very smart of them

ettarose said...

Add that to the Xray glasses and you have it made.

Carol @SheLives said...

The Zig Ziggler of his day?

Crystal Raen said...

LOL. I agree with Laura, totally brainwashing.

Also there's an award on my blog for you if you have a min and want to check it out. Keep up the awesome work!

Lidian said...

Natural - You are exactly right, they still do this today only worded a bit differently.

ettarose - Oh, I can just imagine what a social magnet I could be with this book and some x-ray glasses! :)

Carol - I just had to look Zig Zigler up in Wikipedia...so I learned something today - now I can relax! :)

Crystal - Thank you! :)

Unlikely Oilfield Wife said...

LOL This is freaking great! What a lovely land we would live in if everyone had read this book. Scary!

Lidian said...

Unlikely Oilfield Wife - I can't imagine what it'd be like if we'd all read this book...Yikes!