Sunday, January 25, 2009

Siroil Slick



Mirror, mirror in my hand
Who's the oiliest in the land?
Behold the clever ageing miss
Who defeats psoriasis
With a secret stain-free potion
Which demands complete devotion

You will follow the scary gal
Sir Oil of Canada has in thrall,
Queen of problematic skin
With pointy nails and troubling grin
Her magic compact poised to rage
If you should merely turn the page

So buy a bottle, maybe two -
Her booklet tells you what to do!
Self-marinate for fourteen days
This is the Secret that repays
All who pay homage to Siroil
And with its unctuous virtues toil:

The Queen with profits will be fed
And you can toboggan in your bed.

12 comments:

Shay said...

Does a bottle of red wine vinegar come with it?

Broadway Matron said...

Lovely bit of poetry there LOL

Tori Lennox said...

I don't know, I kind of have a hard time believing it won't stain sheets or clothing. I mean, hello? It's OIL.

Da Old Man said...

Very nice poem. Very slick rhyming scheme.

Lidian said...

Shay - That's such a nice idea, then you could have salad.

Broadway Matron - Thank you, it was an inspiring little ad! :)

Tori - Me too...You just know it's going to ruin the sheets...

Da Old Man - Thank you! I used to write this sort of thing to entertain people in college (without the ads of course) and it is still amusing in my middle ages. To me, anyway! :)

Mary Moore said...

Love it.

ceemee said...

I love your humorous poem. It really kind of inspires me to not buy Siroil. ;-)

Ron Eklof said...

A clever miss I'm sure she is
At turn of phrase she is a whiz
From ads of ages past she plunders
To mine the copy full of blunders
And gives us all a hearty chuckle
Brighter than your own belt buckle.

Oh, well, I enjoy your sparkling wit.
Ron

Bill said...

Aaagghh! Now I have Lulu in my head singing To Siroil With Love.

Please make it stop!

Amy said...

eeewww I wonder if it smells like gravy like most products like this do, I swear I bought a bottle of tanning lotion a few years back and I smelled like a roast out of the oven eewww

Lidian said...

Mary - Thank you! I scanned this ad awhile ago but it really stuck in my head.

ceemee - Oh my goodness! :)

Ron - That was a charming verse, and I am honored!

Bill - Oh, that would have been the perfect title!

Amy - I don't know, but I'll bet it wasn't very nice, anyway...

Crystal Raen said...

Love the poetry for this one ;-)