Sunday, April 19, 2009

The Telltale Skin

Telltale skin - if only Edgar Allen Poe had known about this product, he could have written a dark story about it. But he didn't, did he? So we'll be moving on.

First of all, is this guy 30 or 50? Let's take the average and say he's 40. I guess he looks all right for 40. Sort of boring and smirky, but this ad is from Esquire in 1966. He probably looked good in that context.

He may want to consider skipping the Brylcreem, though. Or perhaps he put Shape-Up in his hair. It does look "excessively moisturized." In other words, greasy.

And that Shape-Up stuff doesn't seem to prevent him from wrinkling up his forehead. Speaking of "telltale skin that shouts 'old before your time!'" That forehead certainly is shouting "old before his time!" I can hear it from here.

The ad also says that male skin is more fibrous - like they all had coconuts for heads. That girl behind the guy is thinking: Darling, you have a complexion like a sisal mat! Well, here's a bottle of cosmetic shellac for you. From Baxter's of California! In a BIG bottle. Because you need to use it round-the-clock. Forever!

And "facial depletion" - that's right out of a horror movie, isn't it? Edgar Allen needs to get on this concept right away! And he could be the next model for Shape-Up, too - because, well, take a look at his 'Before' shot. This is probably just what Poe needed!

10 comments:

Tori Lennox said...

This must be a fabulous product. I bet all the Stars use it since it comes from Beverly Hills!

Lin said...

Oooh, I like the new look!!

Hairball said...

I think the poor guy looks constipated and needs some ENO's fruit salt!

Lidian, you're going to ban me one day for going on and on about ENO's fruit salt aren't you? LOL

Lidian said...

Tori - That's the criterion the celebs use: must come from Beverly Hills!

Lin - It is very dashing, is it not?

Hairball - Oh no, never! You can talk about Eno's all you like. I love Eno's and all its fruit salt pals! And there are probably more fruit salt posts in the future... :)

Diesel said...

That dude just needs some Smirk-a-Way.

Lidian said...

Diesel - He certainly does!

Bill said...

I'd be willing to try anything if I had shouting skin.

What's that thingie in between BAXTER and of California? Is it really a tiny barbell???

Lidian said...

Bill - Yes, I think it is a little barbell. This stuff must be good for your muscles too!

Hairball said...

Hairball - Oh no, never! You can talk about Eno's all you like. I love Eno's and all its fruit salt pals! And there are probably more fruit salt posts in the future... :)Whoot! LOL

Lidian said...

Hairball - I know, it will be fun! :)