Thursday, May 21, 2009

The Walking Paint Box

Dick (the anti-hero of the ad at the left) is upset about Misfit Makeup, and the fact that his date likes to slather it on with a small trowel.

She might do better to slather some of it on him - over his mouth would be good. He'd just look so much better if he didn't talk.

Dick: Take that walking paint box? Not me - I'll stay home first.

Well, that would solve a lot of problems right there. Why don't you stay home? That's a great idea. Because you, sir, are a Walking Rage Ball. And no amount of Richard Hudnut's Marvelous Eye-Matched Makeup is going to solve that problem.

"Helpful" Friend: It isn't you Dick doesn't like...it's your conspicuous makeup.

And, you see, Hudnut's makeup is matched to your eye color, which in turn matches your personality. All the personalities sound like china plate patterns: Dresden, Patrician, Parisian and Continental. *

But as Merle Oberon says, you can find "new friends" and "new fun" if you dip into the Hudnut paint box. And that is just what this woman needs, doesn't she?

Especially the new friends.

*Note: If you have green eyes, like me, tough luck! You have absolutely no personality!

Advertisement (1938) from Ad Access.

12 comments:

P.L. Frederick said...

Dick cares a heck of a lot about make-up. He's got a one-track mind and the destination is Gay. Paint Box, you get on with your life. Sure he's handsome and a great dresser but he ain't never gonna be interested in anything but your eyes.

P.L. Frederick (Small & Big)

Tori Lennox said...

Well, my green eyes and I will sit over here with you in the No Personality section. Hmph. I can think of a few choice things to do to Richard Hudnut and his eye makeup....

Lidian said...

P.L. - This ad is like a lot of the 30s ones - lots of drama and weird psychosexual undercurrrents. You don't see it so much before the 30s (I haven't anyway), but then it's like walking in halfway through a B movie (or, in this case, a D movie really).

Tori - Yes, and we will have much more fun anyway, who needs Richard Hudnut's makeup! :)

Hairball said...

How could they forget about the green eyed gals!?! Crazy!!

As a brown-eyed gal, I spent many of my younger years desperately wanting green eyes. I think it was all those idiotic romance books I read where the heroine's green or blue eyes would be compared to jewels or the ocean. The lady in question rarely had brown eyes as "soulful, like a Basset Hound" just doesn't conjure up the right image. *grins*

Amy said...

yeah I'm with you, I've got green eyes too...

Free Cracked Softwares said...
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Shay said...

My cat has green eyes....

Lidian said...

Hairball - And I always wanted grey eyes, because they were the most unusual (I've only ever known one person with grey eyes)...

Amy - We should start a Green-Eyed Club! What do you think, Tori?

Shay - Mine too, both of them. Plus me and one of my girls, so we are in the majority here :)

Lidian said...

Shay - Um, I meant both of my cats, not both of my eyes.

Bill said...

LOOKY, LIDIAN!!! I'm back! Somehow I broke through the IE forcefield that has prevented me from viewing Kitchen Retro! I'm dizzy with excitement!!!
But it may last only until the IE security guards wake up.

I don't think ladies with lovely green eyes need any makeup (or paint).

Lidian said...

Bill - This is excellent news! And thank you for the delightful compliment, all of us with green eyes are mighty charmed!

Marcheline said...

Well, what on earth was Liz Taylor supposed to do with this brand of makeup... word has it her eyes are VIOLET!