Friday, June 26, 2009

Magical Mystery Meal

Her: Darling, what is this doing here?

Him: Well, sugar - I thought...I thought you might know. I don't even really know what it is.

Her: Do you think the cook made this? Is this supposed to be - dinner? And why is it right in front of me? I can hardly open my eyes up to get a good look at it.

Him: Maybe that fifth coat of mascara was a mistake.

Her: Maybe you should come here and deal with this instead of hiding behind me. It's only something strange in a bowl. Just like lots of meals around here! But - what is it?

Him: You know I don't deal with anything in the kitchen, my little overly-made-up pumpkin. I just show up at the table, clutching my jacket and looking like I just ate a lemon on a cocktail stick. Why you serve lemons for a snack with our martinis I'll never know.

Her: To prepare you for the delicious main course, evidently. Darling.

The Bowl: This is Stouffer's Frozen Creamed Chicken.

Him: Good Lord, that - thing is talking to us!

Her: At least we know what it is now.

The Bowl: You Taste A Priceless Difference! That's what the tagline says, right under me. See it?

Her: Priceless difference indeed! I'm just going to pick up this spoon to defend myself.

Him: I'll be down at the club, I think. I'll just grab something to eat there.

The Bowl: Hey lady, I like what you're wearing. It's the same color as my packaging. Just one suggestion, though. The mascara -

Her: I know, I know. Too much.

The Bowl: Yeah, it's a little over the top. Just like the Stouffer's I've got going on. I think I might go change. Maybe you could put down the spoon and get me a martini for when I get back. And hold the lemons, please.

[I found this 1962 ad over at TJS Labs Graphic Design, for which I thank then very much.]


Hairball said...

I've got cats and trust me on this, you don't want to eat what is in that bowl!

Eric said...

Brilliant narrative Lidian! :)

Uh, if good things make half the difference in Stouffers, then bad things make the other half? Then we are left with just 'things', right?

Lidian said...

Hairball - Ah yes. I have two cats also and I was thinking that. Yum.

Eric - I guess so, since the good-things half must cancel out the bad-things half. Hence the mess in the bowl.

Tori Lennox said...

To me, hubby looks like he knows full well what's in te bowl and he's just waiting for it surprise the little woman. He's got a definite smirk.

Mom said...

I have to go pick myself up off the floor now. THAT was funny.

What WERE they thinking when they decided an ad like that was a good idea?

Kris said...

I think the guy is trying not to breath as I'm sure it smells dreadful.

I also think they are a bit overdressed for a Stauffer's dinner.

So glad I'm not eating over at that house!

Kath Lockett said...

Hubby clearly has a drinking problem and thought he'd hide the 'debris' in the casserole dish and the wife has too much mascara on to notice?!

Meghann LittleStudioPhotographyAndJewellery said...

*gag* Putting it in a pretty dish does NOT make it look any better. And as if people who have those kinds of china dishes eat that crap, puh-leeze!
I liked the talking bowl though, nice touch :)

Unlikely Oilfield Wife said...

lol You never cease to crack me up.

Now I'm hungry for anything that doesn't look mashed! Have a good weekend :)

Lidian said...

Tori - You're right, he IS smirking. I'll bet you're onto something...

Mom - I was wondering what they were thinking, too. my mom used to serve Stouffer's sometimes. Not this, though. Never, ever this!

Kris - Yeah, you know - with that amount of glop, they may be expecting guests! What a surprise they will get, those guests.

Kath - There is a backstory here, yes indeed. I like yours a lot! :)

Meghann - There is a definite discrepancy between the china and the cuisine, which is really funny. Unintentionally so, of course, which is what makes this ad so special.

UOW - Me too. And NO cream sauce either! Hope you have a great weekend too :)

Shay said...

Looks like what we used to call "Creamed Chipped Beast" when I was a kid.

Sinclair said...

Hilarious! I love your commentary.

Lidian said...

Shay - Oh my goodness, you reminded me - we had that too, on toast, sometimes. I believe it was frozen or came in a can (shudder). You had the perfect name for it, too.

Sinclair - Thanks! And i love your avatar, BTW.

Bill said...

You are too funny! Lordy, I've missed Kitchen Retro. My browser has taken a dislike to this website, so I haven't been able to visit. I don't know how I snuck in tonight, so I'd better get busy catching up.

Lidian said...

Bill - And I've been missing your comments! Glad to see you were able to sneak in.

Marcheline said...

This was featured on a YouTube video. I think it was called "Two Upper-Class Snobs, One Bowl".

Cari Hislop said...

Yum! Fresh vomit! And there's enough for ten...