Tuesday, August 4, 2009

"I See Ogden, Utah, I See France..."

Dear Milt Williams, Novelty Guy:


I hardly know what to say about this. I do want to point out a few things though (cue the bullet post!):

-Whether or not these Novelty Pants were really a big seller in 1943, I hardly think that the image of them "going like wildfire" is an attractive one.

-Also, your Pants are not just wrong in an aesthetic sense, but a geographical one, for Pearl Harbor is not located in Ogden, Utah.

-And remembering Pearl Harbor through the medium of synthetic underwear is just seven thousand kinds of wrong. I mean, Milt, really - you know that, right?

-Describing rayon as "extra fine quality rayon" is an oxymoron.

-No one wants a lot of 100 of these. I hope.

-What sort of "camp or city" would want this sort of thing for its residents?

-Never mind, I don't really want to know. On second thought, maybe I do. Then I will be able to to stay far, far away.

From Billboard, October 13, 1943.


The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

Oh my.... those are the ugliest pants Ive ever seen - in my life! lolol....a gem amongt advertising gems



Eric said...

I wonder if these were the kind that girls bought back then so they could throw up on stage at a concert. Then the band could remember where they've been?

ps - low quality rayon, just say no.

The Peach Tart said...

not very becoming at all

Tori Lennox said...

I have this horrifying image of all these campers sharing pants while they're at camp. *shudder*

Bill said...

I think they should be emblazoned with GREETINGS!!! YOU WERE HERE!

Lidian said...

Tracy - Yup, Billboard is a goldmine!

Eric - Interesting idea. I'm sure Sinatra et al would have been thrilled.

Peach Tart - Nope, not at all.

Tori - I was thinking about what a terrible camp that would be, too. Ick.

Bill - I'll bet Milt Williams DID make them with that slogan ;)

Dr. Julie-Ann said...

My mind is reeling with possibilities...

beth said...

Extra fine quality rayon is pretty flammable, so they're correct in the wildfire assessment.
And they ARE a novelty, so the copywriters nailed that one also.
A printed greeting is genius! It detracts from the unattractive fit and is the perfect icebreaker during those awkward moments.

(And yes, I want one, like every other zany product you post about, Lidian!)

autie said...

Maybe Virginia should get them...it might go with the whole "Virginia is for Lovers" thing...

Seriously, I live in Virginia Beach; a tourist city; and people buy the strangest (and terribly ugly) junk while they're here.

Lidian said...

Dr. Julie-Ann - Please do tell ;)

beth - Yes, they didn't mention the extra terrible fit. How clever of them!

If only I could open a little Zany Products store attached to K-Retro, what fun that would be! :)

autie - I remember that 'Virginia is for Lovers' slogan - maybe they could have done one for each of the states, and then they could sell them in a set of 50 :)

Anonymous said...

if you walk through target or walmart the racks are full of panties with stoopid quotes ("i tawt i taw a putty tat...")and cartoon characters... in this case truth is stanger than fiction... anyone else remember all the nationalist t-shirts, headbands and presuemably underwear that came out after 9-11?

Lidian said...

Anonymous - Yes, that's true...And I think this is perpetrated especially on children's underwear. Not a big fan of the cartoons and quotations on underwear for anyone. Then there are those days-of-the-week pants, I think they were of this mid-century retro era. I hope they don't still make those...

Marcheline said...

"Novelty". Definition? A total piece of crap made by someone hoping to start a fad. A fad which will probably never catch on.

"Novelty Company". Definition? A sweaty bald guy in a basement apartment in Queens trying to make money on a piece of crap that he hopes will start a fad. A fad which will probably never catch on.