Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Live And Let Dye

You Know These Beautiful Women...

I don't, actually. One reason being that they are hiding the lower half of their faces. I don't really know why. Perhaps the Miss Clairol went on their chins. Maybe they all have ZZ Top beards. Maybe turkey neck is setting in.

All I know is that the blonde and the redhead are doing that sneaky-side-eyes thing that says: How soon can I bolt? If I run like the wind, maybe the photo will be really blurred. And then nobody will see my mouthful of fangs. Just the mop of Technicolored Dynel on top of my head. Still, better hold something up in front of my face, just to make sure.

And the brunette is just ignoring everything, because she's Very Busy reading the paper and keeping up with Current Events. Or she might be holding a white shopping bag up to her face. One or the other.

Miss Clairol would like you to stop wondering what's wrong with these gals' faces and notice that they don't sell anything as icky as hair dye or color - oh no! It is a hair color bath. A bath of Golden Apricot, or Flame, or Coffee. Not "dye" or "rinse." The quotation marks are theirs. They are very sensitive about this. Maybe the models were joking about hair dye and the Clairol Curse struck them, right in the mouth. Instant fangs and beards! So just be careful when you ask for this at the store.

From Ad Access.

20 comments:

wngl said...

"maybe they have ZZ Top beards" -beautiful hilarity on a beautiful post!

Tori Lennox said...

I'm betting the "bath" description confused them and they filled the tub and jumped in and now their entire bodies are some funky color. Except for the top halves of their faces, of course.

The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

Oh I adore quotation marks in ads, they are the funnest ever

Tracy

Lidian said...

wngl - Why, thank you :)

Tori - That is also a distinct possibility.

Tracy - So do I, they are a real treat ;)

Hairball said...

That is some mighty vivid red and blonde hair those ladies are sporting!

Lidian said...

Hairball - It certainly is a little overpowering!

B Boys Mom said...

Very funny.

Eric said...

Great stuff!
Maybe by calling it a bath, it implies that one should use their products more often?

Rob said...

I like the idea that they have ZZ Top beards! That would be a very funny segue!

Staci at Just Bloggled said...

Hair color bath--my first thought was, "Well, if you want the curtains to match the drapes, that's your way to go."

I gave you an award on my blog. You can pick it up here: http://www.justbloggled.com/2009/09/i-love-lucys-bees-knees-and-my-bengay.html. Congrats!

Drowsey Monkey said...

I bet it's the beards. Definitely ZZ top style.

But notice how this ad seems to be saying brunettes are more intelligent and serious than redheads and blonds. Hmmmm

Lidian said...

B Boys Mom - That Ad Access is full of funny stuff!

Eric - I think it just avoids the horror of the word "dye"!

Rob - It really would. But can they sing "Sharp Dressed Man"? Or rather "Well Dyed Hair."

Staci - Oh, what wold Miss Clairol say to that? She would faint, I think! lol

And thank you so much for the award!

Drowsy Monkey - I didn't catch that, you are absolutely right! The brunette reads, the other two simper with their eyes. Sigh.

Relax Max said...

You should write humor articles. Well, I guess you do, come to think of it. I too like to look at pictures and make up words that seem to go with the pictures instead of just reading the caption copy.

scottsabode said...

I'm thinking warts...

Lidian said...

Max - Thank you...I guess I do, too. I wish someone would ask me to write a column of this sort of thing but - well, that is very unlikely :)

scottsabode - Could be warts, yes. Lots of chemicals in those hair - dyes!

Amy said...

yep it looks like they're pretending to be au natural, like they never dyed their hair in the first place.

Lidian said...

Amy - Yeah, they don't know a thing about it. Never met Miss Clairol in their lives. In their life? Anyway, they don't know her.

Relax Max said...

Well, I just asked you to. What am I, chopped liver? Oh. You mean for money. Never mind.

Margo said...

something about a bath sounds so fleeting and temporary - like something that would be perfect for Halloween. I've always wanted my hair color to be FLAME.

Lidian said...

Max - You are not chopped liver. And i did mean for money ;)

Margo - I used to put temporary purple streaks in my hair at Halloween but it didn't take, no one could even see it, lol