Monday, October 26, 2009

I Dreamed A Green Pelican Disliked My Halloween Costume


If you're looking for a good Halloween costume - keep on looking. Because this is not it.

You will just look like you forgot the top half of the ballerina outfit. I guess you could go as a forgetful ballerina, though. A forgetful ballerina with a lion head. Or a bird head (don't forget the cage and the jelly bean bird seed!). Or any number of other animal heads. There's a definite animal theme (except for the moon, at the bottom left, who seems to be hunting down the animal ballerinas for some reason).

What I really want to know is what the model is supposed to be for Halloween, in the big picture. She is wearing the worst looking plant-hat ever! It does distract one's attention from her shirtlessness. Sort of. But mostly it just makes her look like the unpredictable sort of guest who's going to cause a ruckus at the punchbowl at some point in the evening.

It also looks like her head is being squeezed by a rabid green pelican. Clearly, it does not approve of this semi-costume of hers. And it is all kinds of hungry, too.

If I were her, I'd stop preening for the camera and try to locate some jelly beans, pronto.

Many thanks to Althouse for this one. She got it from one of her commenters, so many thanks to him or her as well.

15 comments:

The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

LOL! Honestly those ads, and I've run across one or two...are so bizarre. I don't get them at all and they seem, a bit drug related or something.

Jude said...

They probably thought these ads were wonderful way back when and you do come up with some funny ones.

Me-Me King said...

This ad reminds me when my mother had me fitted for a Pennyrich bra. At 13, I was totally humiliated! It was not a time where I wanted to appear so pointy.

Lidian said...

Tracy - They seem that way to me, too.

Jude - I was hunting for Halloween-related ads and I was getting a little tired of Brach's candy corn owls! ;)

Me-Me - Those Maidenforms are kind of pointy, which would be one reason to wear a top (there are several other reasons, too, of course)

The Bewildered Brit said...

I love how she seems to try out a variety of somewhat scary animal masks before deciding on taping some lettuce to her ears and gluing a bouquet of flowers to her cheek

How on earth did she decide this was the lettuce-bouquet-glued-to-face costume was the best of the bunch?

This, truly, is the stuff of nightmares.

Great post nonetheless! :)

Leeuna said...

Seriously, how small is that woman's waistline? Is it me (and my jealousy) or is her waistline about 10 inches?!!! Maybe salad hats make you look trimmer.

Lidian said...

The Bewildered Brit - Yes, it is hard to interpret her choices and costume priorities. I think that, judging from other 1950s Maidenform ads, that the product affected one mentally in some odd way.

Leeuna - You do need to remove a rib or two in order to really wear this costume properly. Or else wear a very scary corset. Either one.

Toronto home staging said...

Hi. Really a retro ad. The first thing that I noticed was her waist. I don't know whether it could be really so tight or it's just a bad composite photography. Well, and the bra...I can say only that it was trendy in those times and probably the same will be after 50 years with nowadays ads.

Take care,
Ella

Eric said...

Um, I know it's kind of wrong, but I'm vaguely interested in going to a halloween party where girls are dressed in short skirts and bras, even though the pelican, duck, horse, and various other full head animal masks are kind of a turn off.

Georgina said...

Wow, she looks like houseplant. And the women in the background with animal head masks? Why does that just look so wrong and so kinky? - G

Lidian said...

Ella - I read once that fashions have about a 20 year cycle (give or take a few years) - hence the 70s look a few years ago, and now the awful 80s trends coming back a little (I sure hope that they stay away though, esp. shoulder pads!)

Eric - It would be different, for sure. But what would your costume be like?

Georgina - She does have a houseplant vibe. I wouldn't know how to talk to that houseplant...

Amy said...

very strange - how could she forget to put her top on...hmm

Pelican Cases said...

Its great to look back and reflect upon the "genius" ideas that had been advertised in the past. I think my favorite one is the old advertisements for cigarettes, aimed toward women. They were called "Freedom Sticks". Also, the doctor approval posters and commercials for smoking and that it was good for your health. We have been very strange creatures in the past.

Marcheline said...

This woman has nothing to fear from Hungry Green Pelican Feather Beast.

All she has to do is turn her microscopic waist a few degrees to starboard and pierce it with her finely honed bra cups - filed to razor-sharp points for just such occasions!

You never know what sort of riffraff you'll encounter at masquerades where people aren't even expected to get dressed!

Anne Packrat said...

Love the Laurel and Hardy masks in the upper right. Don't remember either of them having breasts... Though maybe Hardy had man breasts.