Saturday, October 3, 2009

Mad As Parched Hair

Mother: Just look at me Joan...faded, forty and finished. And fed-up. And frangible. And filled with freakishly far-fangled fears! And -

Joan: Oh, do stop already, mummy! Let's not go through the whole alphabet today, for a change. And anyway, all that's the matter is that the cartoonist drew you funny. Just tell him to erase your jowls!

Mother: It's not the jowls. The jiggling, jellyful jowls. You're supposed to talk about my hair!

Joan: Oh, right. Well, now that you mention it. It is a little - parched.

Mother: I stuck my head in the teapot, didn't that help?

Joan: What you really need is Bristow's.

Mother: Bristles?

Joan: No, Bristow's. It is shampoo with a lot of lather. And nothing to mix or spill. It is gel, maybe.

[shampoo interlude]

Joan: And now look at you! It's like you have a totally different head of hair - darker, longer, curlier. Did you put on a wig while I was getting a towel just now? Different hair...and - a different face! Same jowls, though. I recognize those. This is just like something out of Alice in Wonderland. Mother?

Last Panel Lady: Hello dear, who are you? Do I know you?

[Thank you Amy for this one!]

10 comments:

vanilla said...

Great dialogue. Totally cracking up.

'Hello dear,... do I know you?'

Lidian said...

vanilla - Thank you, it was a fun ad to write about.

Tori Lennox said...

No snarky cleverness from me today. You pretty well covered all the bases. :)

Jessica Cangiano said...

It's great to know shampoo ads have been over-zealously selling the merits of their products for many a decade. Herbal Essences has nothing on these product-happy gals ;D

Hope you have a marvelous weekend, my dear!
♥ Jessica

Amy said...

LOL you always know how to make these ads humours - good work :-)

scottsabode said...

Bristow's also adds lipstick! Great alliteration BTW.

Hairball said...

I'm sure if the ad had shown her whole body, we would have seen that she had lost weight and gotten a new dress in addition to the wig and lipstick.

Now that is some mighty powerful shampoo!! :)

Lidian said...

Tori - I was in a snarky mood, I think :)

Jessica - And yet somehow I do prefer Herbal Essence ;) Hope you have a great weekend too!

Amy - You find the most wonderful ads, thank you again :)

scottsabode - It is a VERY powerful shampoo...

Hairball - It is an Extreme Makeover in a tube.

Janna said...

LOL!
I'm going to be 40 in January.
Faded, forty, and finished.
For some reason, that's actually kind of fun to say. :)

Lidian said...

Janna - That sounds wonderfully young to me :) I am going to be 47 pretty soon. And it is fun to say! I don;t know why, but it is.