Tuesday, December 22, 2009

A Blizzard of Downyflakes

It's contest time again!

Downyflake Waffles, whose name is more suitable to wash powder (and best not delve into that too deeply) want you to complete a sycophantic quatrain, and they're willing to make your pockets jingle with anywhere from $10 to $5000 dollars. That was a lot of money in 1956; my mother's grocery bill around this time was $10 a week in New York City, so you can translate that into 2009 money. And as for the $5000, it was a year's grocery money. In other words, it was a whole lot of dough (or waffle batter).

But I don't like the idea of the jingling pockets too much because this implies that you're getting the prize money in Downyflake's leftover change. I guess they went around to everyone in the company asking for loose pennies and nickels. You'd be jingling all right if you won $5000 in pennies, would you not?

So here's the deal. You're supposed to finish this little poetic gem:

Frozen Downyflake 1-Minute Waffles
With homemakers really do rate
Wonderfully tasty, so simple to serve....

-You'll want to eat seven or eight
-They get cold if you leave them too late
-No thank you, I already ate
-That aftertaste soon will abate
-Those downy flakes sure wash clothes great!*


There are some rhymes for rate over here, if you want to give it a bash.

And if you'd like more retro contest amusement, here's an Old Dutch Cleanser jingle contest and a caption-the-baby-picture contest. The enormous version of the ad is over here; this is from Life, September 24, 1956 (which gave you a couple of months to think of jingles).

*They may not choose this one as part of their advertising campaign, though.

11 comments:

The Crazy Suburban Mom said...

Frozen Downyflake 1-Minute Waffles
With homemakers really do rate
Wonderfully tasty, so simple to serve....

But like eating a freaking lead plate?

Richard @ The Bewildered Brit said...

"Those downy flakes sure wash clothes great!"

I vote for this one! :D

Vintage Christine said...

Frozen Downyflake 1-Minute Waffles
With homemakers really do rate
Wonderfully tasty, so simple to serve....

And crappy poems such as these really hit my last nerve!

(yeah, I know we're supposed to rhyme with "rate" but you took all the good "rate" rhymes).

Lidian said...

Tracy - I like that very much! And it was probably true, too.

Richard - Well, it just makes sense! Like a cross between Ivory soap flakes and Downy fabric softener (yum!)

Christine - That has a nice modern/unrhymed ring to it - very Gregory Corso (and I like his stuff a lot)

Grace said...

I remember Downyflake waffles - and if memory serves they were good, if they weren't we wouldn't have eaten them again and again - and I remember jingle contests. I entered quite a few when I was a kid, I think I even won a few.

Eric said...

Even drunk, mom can make a plate?

Awaiting their syrupy fate?

They will give you a Bigfoot gait?

Katherine said...

Frozen Downyflake 1-Minute Waffles
With homemakers really do rate
Wonderfully tasty, so simple to serve....
"Not long in the bathroom you'll wait!"

Tori Lennox said...

"If you're not eating WHAM, you're not eating ham!"

Oh, wait. I was suddenly channeling the old Cary Grant movie, Mr Blandings Builds His Dream House.

But, hey, ham (or WHAM) with waffles sounds tasty....

Lidian said...

Grace - I like the old jingle contests a lot, they must have been fun. What did you win?

Eric - Those are all prize-winners,, I think!

Katherine - That's a good one, too (and very true, I am sure).

Tori - Or Spork! That is Canadian SPAM, and it was quite delightful, just about as much as you'd expect.

Erin Bried said...

Frozen Downyflake 1-Minute Waffles
With homemakers really do rate
Wonderfully tasty, so simple to serve....

So good, you'll want to mate!

Lidian said...

Erin - That's a winner all right! ;)