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It's almost time for some fun retro Thanksgiving ads, but this one caught my eye this morning: one of those dramatic 1930s ads with a Can-This-Marriage-Be-Saved? storyline. "Can This Marriage Be Saved?" is a Ladies' Home Journal column, still running today, that I used to read avidly back in the 60s when I was little. I read all kinds of stuff back then. I'm not sure my mother was aware of it, exactly.
But I never came across a couple who were having problems because of the bathroom drains.
Having said that, one problem here is that he's "a man who doesn't talk much" and just glares at you when something's the matter. And when the drain is a little bit slow, his eyes shoot out daggers! I think he'd have a little problem here because our house is old and so are the drains and, well - you have this happen sometimes, too, right? It's just one of those things.
Just grab the Drano, sir, and pour it in. It really isn't anyone's fault. Maybe your wife has to use a lot of starch on your shirts and that clogs things up (OK, I have no idea what I'm talking about, but bear with me). Dressing up like F. Scott Fitzgerald every day takes a toll on the sinks - all that washing and using hair pomade and so on. You never saw Zelda using Drano. Not even in the fountains she and Scott were dancing in every night.
Nevertheless, just one little tablespoon of Drano gets the drains "open and fast flowing." Too bad it can't get Scott here to be open and - well, not fast flowing. Maybe to give everyone a little smile. A half smile? Even a smirk would be a vast improvement, sir.
In the end, I really don't think drains are this couple's worst problem.