Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Betty Drinks the Kool-Aid

Vintage Ad Browser
Oh look, Betty's Mom left her an Easter surprise!  And a note, explaining (perhaps) what is going on here:

Betty - 
Any girl who says she has the prettiest mother in the Easter Parade deserves something special
-- Mom

I'm sure that Betty was not expecting a special pitcher of purple-flavored Kool-Aid, though. I am trying to imagine the Mom coming home and thinking: what is the most amazing thing I can do for my daughter who is so full of compliments? Oh, I know! I will make her some colored water full of sugar and artificial grape flavoring that is sometimes used to dye Easter eggs, because the dye is so potent and annoying...

Yes, that will be perfect!

So Betty supposed to come home, shriek with delight, tell Mom she is not only the prettiest but the nicest, best, most thoughtful mother in the Easter Parade. Yes, of course. And then she is supposed to start slurping. I don't see any glasses on the table. Perhaps Betty is meant to pick up the pitcher and glug it down in one go.

Hint to Betty: try drinking from the spout end. It will be slightly less messy. And if you make a mess with the purple Kool-Aid, Mom won't be quite so happy, will she? She might even make you try some of those multi-colored mini squash she put in the Easter basket for you. Yes, I know that they are supposed to be eggs. They look like mini squash, though.

The copy at the bottom of the ad says that the packet makes 2 quarts. That is a lot of purple Kool-Aid, Betty. I guess Mom thinks that you talked about how great she is for so long that you are really, really thirsty. So drink that Kool-Aid, sister. Just make sure you don't get any on your fancy pink dress and little white gloves. Mother will not be so pretty and friendly then, will she?

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