Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Valley of the VisQueens

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VisQueen is the name that you want to be looking for when you're in the mood to wrap everything in your kitchen in colored plastic wrap. Put pink plastic wrap on your table, so you can keep your cool when Susie spills a whole glass of milk all over the place.

Mind you, she spilled it because she was surprised to see what you did to your apron - wrapped it in blue plastic like you were some kind of leftover. And right behind you, the coffee pot is swathed in translucent purple.

"I do hope you remembered the purple VisQueen."
Yes, as a matter of fact, you did buy a roll of VisQueen in every color. It's fun to wrap everything in plastic, Susie! "Tasteless bowl covers" (yes, aren't they just?) do a "flavor favor" for your salads and puddings and whatever else you have going on in those bowls.

Wrap that bread in yellow. And yellow for the Jell-O too, because it rhymes. Isn't this fun? Just watch out for your sandwich, Susie - if you don't keep a close eye on it, Mother will wrap it up just as you're about to take another bite.

Yes, you too can enter into a world of endless wrapping and unwrapping. Make your kitchen into something Tutankhamun - indeed, all the mummies in the Valley of the Kings - would be proud of. "You couldn't possibly ask for more safety - for less!" Or for more obsession with wrapping things up - and outright madness. No, you couldn't.

[The 1821 image of the entrance to one of the royal tombs at Thebes is from Wikipedia, link here.]


vanilla said...

Big, heavy rolls, eight feet wide. Wrap your foundation.

Marcheline said...

I don't know about wrapping all the appliances, but I LOVE THAT KITCHEN!